


recipe for disaster

by whooooops (galaxyknights)



Category: JBJ (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-12
Updated: 2018-04-12
Packaged: 2019-04-22 01:28:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14297769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxyknights/pseuds/whooooops
Summary: Kenta @rikym · 1h@hodu0307 (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ 아니“Did somebody send nudes?” Sanggyun asks, elbowing Donghan in the side and leaning into his space to peer at his phone.“Better,” Donghan says with a smirk, “I finally got a reply from Kenta.”--aka donghan is a moody model obsessed with kenta, a semi-successful cooking youtuber





	recipe for disaster

It’s Tuesday night.

 

“Break up the meat with a wooden spoon, and add the carrot and mushrooms in. Once those are soft, add the mixture into the mashed potatoes from earlier,” Kenta says, spooning the ground beef and vegetables from the pan into a bowl. Donghan pulls his blanket up a little higher, trying to combat the chill of his dark bedroom. The light from the phone screen bathes his face in harsh white, and he just barely manages not to jostle an ill-fated popcorn bag off the bed. “Add the egg and mix it all together really well! But then you have to let it sit because it’s way too hot to touch.”

 

On screen, the camera switches to a more vlog-style, with Kenta sitting behind the kitchen counter, elbows propped up and his chin in his hands. Big goofy ears stick out from his fluffy mess of brown hair. “While that’s cooling, then, why don’t we talk about something? Have you guys seen the new Teen Top music video? Didn’t Ricky look incredible!” He beams, eyes sparkling as he talks about his kpop obsession.

 

Donghan’s lips curl up in response. He’s cute he’s _so unbelievably cute!_ Donghan is only into kpop as much the next 20 year old in Seoul, but Kenta’s genuine love for it makes him want to listen to Teen Top all the time. He takes a screenshot of Kenta’s sweet snaggletooth smile and adds it to a new tweet.

 

 **Donghan** @hodu0307 · 6m

My crush sent me a pic

-image-

 

 **Sanggyun** @atommy · 4m

@hodu0306 lucky!!!! my crush n ever sends anything TT

 

 **Donghyun** @softbatman · 3m

@hodu0306 you’re WHIPPED

 

 **Hyunbin** @komurola · 1m

@hodu0306 if ur going to keep watching these food videos at least cook something for me ONCE

 

 **Donghan** @hodu0307 · 32s

@komurola you don’t deserve my skills

 

Donghan closes the app, sighs, and puts more popcorn in his mouth while waiting for the next video to load. Kenta hasn’t put up a new video yet this week so Donghan’s stuck bingeing old ones, trying not to think about why he’s unhappy, trying not to think about anything at all and just let the YouTuber’s cheerful laugh bring some peace to his soul.

 

\--

 

Work is boring, but there are worse things than boring. He teases some of the younger models, pets their perfectly coiffed hair like kittens until the stylist noonas start beating him with rolled up magazines for ruining their hard work.

 

“Did the manager contact you about the Coach photoshoot next week?” Hyunbin’s gravelly voice asks before the large man sits down with the uncommon grace that only comes from having been a model since childhood.

 

Donghan turns his head to see Hyunbin in full makeup. He tries not to laugh—this particular shoot is for some new line of colognes that all have different avian themes, and while most of the models got reasonable birds like ravens or owls, someone high up had stuck Hyunbin with a bird of paradise. Long, colorful antennae trail artfully from the top of his head to roughly three feet in the air above. Hyunbin spots the humor in his eyes and gives a warning glare. His bright turquoise eye shadow paired with the intimidating gaze makes it too much to handle, and Donghan can’t hold back his cackle as he slaps his hand against Hyunbin’s arm.

 

They’re joined by Sanggyun while Hyunbin’s frown grows. Sanggyun was given a dove as his bird, and is made up in snowy white tones, which contrast perfectly with his sunshine smile. He laughs as he approaches them, already ready to be a part of the joke. “What’s up?”

 

“Hodu is being a brat again,” Hyunbin mutters gruffly, visibly struggling not to wipe at the bright glitter on his cheekbones.

 

“What’s new?” Sanggyun continues with a grin. He sits on Donghan’s other side. “Our dongsaeng can’t help being a brat, it’s just his personality.”

 

Donghan sticks out his tongue, and dodges when Hyunbin makes to grab it between his fingers.

“Who did you piss off this time?” Donghan asks.

 

Sanggyun raises his eyebrows and looks to Hyunbin, but the tallest boy just pouts, “I didn’t piss anybody off. I think I was only one who fit into the leotard.”

 

“No way, they definitely had that specially made for you. Who else would wear an extra-large, feathered unitard?”

 

“Sorry hyung, someone has it out for you,” Donghan laughs, and reaches up to jostle one of the antennae. It waggles gently and Hyunbin’s brows furrow in concentration while he racks his brain for who might be getting back at him.

 

Donghan is called up for his turn in front of the camera. They’re just doing some preliminary shots before they go to an arboretum tomorrow to get a bit of wilderness in the background. His clothes are all black, with streaming tendrils meant to look like feathers flowing behind him when he moves. The heavy black makeup around his eyes is sharp and mysterious, cast from shadows like a raven.

 

They pose him in front of a white background, then a black backdrop. He’s been modeling for long enough that he’s used to the long hours and uncomfortable poses. He smolders appropriately until the producer waves him off. “We got enough for now. You can go. Kwon Hyunbin, next!”

 

Donghan blows a kiss at Hyunbin as they pass each other. Hyunbin attempts a bird sound in response but is interrupted by one of the producers calling out to him in a voice laced with the drama of someone who thinks they should be on a stage.

 

“Oh Bin-ah don’t you look so beautiful! Perfect! Come stand here my perfect boy. I just knew this would suit your style.”

 

Donghan catches Sanggyun’s wide eyes as he enters the makeup area and they both giggle. After a moment Donghan tries to reorder his features and he swats at Sanggyun, “Don’t kinkshame.”

 

It just makes Sanggyun laugh more.

 

\--

 

He’s in a mood again after a long day at work; he’s been in a mood more often than not lately. There’s nothing to look forward to. The future is full of endless branching possibilities and none of them interest Donghan, like the grey winter landscape has infected his mindset.

 

Maybe he should go out. Make some kind of effort to be normal.  Try and flirt with someone dumb and impressionable at a neon-soaked bar, someone that won’t care that he’s a vapid emotionally constipated mess. A pretty face and crooked smile are really all you need to get someone interested these days.

 

It really might be fun. But he has to get up early tomorrow, and it would be annoying to drag himself out of someone stranger’s apartment in the middle of the night to change before work.

 

After barely bothering to lie to himself that it wasn’t inevitable, Donghan finds himself following his usual routine.

 

“This is a pretty fast, easy dish that I love to eat in the mornings,” Kenta says after his intro plays. He flashes his trademark toothy grin to the camera, and Donghan’s heart flutters. Is it weird to be this affected by someone who doesn’t know he exists? He jokes about it online but it’s all only about 30% facetious.

 

“Okra is slimy and natto is slimy and if you add a poached egg it’s just like—this incredible delicious mess.” Kenta laughs, and Donghan shifts on his cheap mattress so he’s on his side, cheek pressed against the pillow as he stares at his screen, a small smile turning up his lips without his notice. He is feeling a bit better. Kenta’s videos always make him feel better.

 

It’s not that Donghan has things particularly hard now. His mother struggled to raise her two sons as a single parent. Sometimes they would sleep in the car for a few weeks after too many months of missed rent, would wear the same school uniform year after year even though their ankles stuck out from the bottom. No, things aren’t that bad any more. He doesn’t go hungry unless he has to for work. He sends back half his paycheck to his mom. He’s not wealthy, not famous, but he’s living well. He tells himself this daily, as if that will change anything.

 

“Actually,” Kenta says, after the sliced okra’s been washed and boiled and he’s mixing it with natto and mustard. “This is probably one of my favorite dishes? But it can be hard to find natto if you don’t live around a Japanese grocery store.”

 

A light goes off above Donghan’s head. He’s tried his hand at making Kenta’s recipes before. But if this is one of his favorites—maybe it would be nice to try something Kenta loves? It could make him feel closer to the older boy, which usually eases his heart a bit. Donghan doesn’t know any Japanese grocery stores around Seoul offhand, though. Too lazy to look it up, he watches through until the next video plays, and the next one. The halogen street lamps outside dust the blank walls of his apartment in a grainy gray haze. The springs in his bed press into his side. Kenta makes strawberry shortcake and talks about the garden he hopes to have one day. Donghan wonders to himself if he has ever met anyone that shines this brightly in real life.

 

He doesn’t mind following the subtitles along the bottom of the screen, translating Kenta’s Japanese into Korean. Still, the reading makes his eyes tired.

 

He falls asleep with his phone in his hand again.

 

\--

 

When Donghan wakes up the first thing he does is check Twitter. Like most people his age, he’s addicted to social media and his early schedule usually means his friends have stayed up late joking around while he slept.

 

 **Donghyun** @softbatman · 8h

I want to go out!! Do something!! Embrace the night!!

 

 **Paca** @imym95 · 8h

@softbatman it’s almost midnight????

 

 **Ponyo** @jsewoon · 7h

@softbatman I’ll go with you ((:

 

 **Sanggyun** @atommy · 5h

kisses

-image-

 

 **Taedong** @moonwalkin9 · 5h

@atommy @krumpking taehyun control your man

 

 **Taehyun** @krumpking · 4h

@atommy @moonwalkin9 stop making out with your iphone x it's not waterproof

 

 **Kenta** @rikym · 3m

Why do you guys want me to do a room tour so bad lol ! I am too messy you do not need to witness it.

-translated from Japanese-

 

Donghan stops scrolling and immediately likes Kenta's tweet. He takes a moment to type up a quick reply.

 

 **Donghan** @hodu0307 · 2s

@rikym show your bedroom!! (;

 

He’s barely hit send before his alarm goes off, the first few bars of War of Hormone blasting at unforgiving decibels from his hand. Donghan sighs, slides out of bed and into his house slippers.

 

The morning motions pass quickly, quietly--he’s mindful not to wake Taehyun, who sleeps in the second bedroom. He skips breakfast, takes the train from Hongdae to Gangnam. Greets his coworkers with a practiced false cheer, greets his two friends with slightly more genuine emotion.

 

“Aren’t the flowers here beautiful?” Sanggyun asks. He gestures vaguely outward and Donghan looks around at the greenhouse in the arboretum they’re shooting in. It’s lush with vibrant greenery and waxy tropical flowers that would look out of place even if it wasn’t the dead of winter in Seoul.

 

To be honest, Donghan hadn’t even noticed. He literally couldn’t be bothered less to stop and smell the roses. But Donghan loves his friends, so he plays along, “Not as lovely as you, hyung.”

 

On break, Donghan leans on Sanggyun sleepily and pulls out his phone. Eunki, another Korean fan of Kenta’s, has filled his notifications.

 

 **Eunki** @ggcovers · 1h

@rikym @hodu0307 OMG

 

 **Eunki** @ggcovers · 1h

@hodu0307 omL donghan you are the most successful fan

 

 **Eunki** @ggcovers · 1h

im so jealous of @hodu0307 when will senpai notice ME

 

Donghan scrolls farther, rushing through all the random likes from accounts he doesn’t recognize.

 

 **Kenta** @rikym · 1h

@hodu0307 (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ 아니

 

Donghan can’t help the wild smile that breaks out from his lips. Kenta replied? What the hell? Kenta replied! Donghan stares at the cute little emoji--and the Korean (even if it just says ‘No’ Kenta still wrote in Korean just for him!). He likes it and unlikes it just so he can like it again--takes a screenshot and hovers his thumb over the comment icon. Should he reply again? No way would Kenta start an actual conversation with him--

 

“Did somebody send nudes?” Sanggyun asks, elbowing Donghan in the side and leaning into his space to peer at his phone.

 

“Better,” Donghan says with a smirk, “I finally got a reply from Kenta.”

 

“Nice!” Sanggyun’s giggle bubbles up like champagne. “Does he reply to people a lot?”

 

“Uhh,” Donghan pauses to think about it. Does he? It’s not something he’s known for, but--, “I don’t think so.”

 

“That’s awesome. I can’t wait to be the best man at your wedding.”

 

“Hey, slow down, hyung. Donghyun will definitely be my best man.”

 

“What?” Sanggyun pouts, “Can I be the ring bearer at least?”

 

Donghan shrugs, “I’m feeling generous; why not?”

 

“Yes! I’m gonna put it on my resume: probable ring bearer.”

 

“Don’t wanna seem too overqualified.”

 

“Yah, that’s a big issue these days,”  Sanggyun crinkles his nose, and his laugh draws the attention of a stylist who hollers that he’s going to mess up his makeup. The two boys exchange an exasperated look.

 

\--

 

Work goes smoothly. Donghan’s scene is a massive nest made up of dark, woven twigs. He’s not sure if someone made it on set or not, but it’s not even in the top 10 weirdest things he’s seen at a shoot.

 

He scrolls impatiently through his timeline while he waits for the next scene. Does Kenta reply to fans a lot? He clicks on the replies tab of Kenta’s profile and what appears makes him feel a rush of something hot and unkind.

 

What does it even matter if Kenta replied to him? Apparently he replies to lots of people. At least a couple a day. It was inevitable, really, that eventually Donghan would be one of the random fans he sent an emoji to. Donghan feels pathetic for getting so excited earlier. Why is Kenta even so special to him? He’s cute sure, but Donghan knows lots of cute people. He could probably have a date with someone cuter than Kenta by the end of his shift if he wanted to! Donghan is more of a catch than any of the other random losers Kenta replied to. Donghan could do better.

 

But...no one else makes his heart soar stupidly with just a small, snarky smile like Kenta does. No one else’s voice soothes him from any mood swing. When he’s on the train home and suddenly gets a rush of emotion--a weird primal urge to look at a picture of Kenta as quickly as possible or else sit down and cry in a half-full subway car--he’s never felt like that about anyone else. It’s a dumb internet crush but it might be the only thing that makes him happy these days.

 

So, it’s something, Donghan tries to convince himself. A small reply. Even this interaction is more than he had yesterday. More than some people ever have with their idols. He picks at the skin by his nails until he’s called for his last portion of the shoot.

 

\--

 

The models are finally dismissed sometime after dark.

 

“Oh—,” Donghan says as he puts on his coat, “Hyung, do you know of any Japanese grocery stores around here? I’m trying to find something for a recipe.”

 

Hyunbin’s mouth curves into an upside-down U while he thinks about it, “Maybe across the street from the weird arcade we went to last year? I know there used to be one there, but I haven’t been by in years so it might have closed.”

 

Donghan plasters a wide smile on his face, “Thank you! I’ll check it out.”

 

“What do you need from a special grocery store? And you’re making this dish for _me_ , right?” Hyunbin says, coming up behind him and elbowing Donghan’s back as they waddle in their oversized coats into the crisp evening.

 

Donghan shrugs, and gives a sly sideways glance, “Maybe if you earn it.”

 

Hyunbin crinkles his nose, “I don’t want to do any of your weird dares, I’ll just go to a street cart again.”

 

“Your loss,” Donghan says, “This time I just wanted chicken feet.”

 

Hyunbin considers it, “Fine. When are you cooking?”

 

“Depends on if the store is open. Do you wanna come with?”

 

“Nah, that part of town gives me the creeps.”

 

“You’re the one telling me to go there!”

 

“I didn’t tell you to do anything, but if you want those chicken feet you’ll make it back in one piece.”

 

“Yah, aren’t you being too much?”

 

Hyunbin gives a squishy smile and waves as he starts off in the opposite direction. “Message me~.”

 

“Aish,” Donghan huffs, and bundles himself deeper into his coat.

 

\--

 

The grocery store is just where Hyunbin said it would be, across from the arcade, which is now boarded up and dark. The neighborhood doesn’t seem dangerous, just dimly lit and quiet. The yellow street lamps do little to ward off the night.

 

The store is small, on the second level above a family restaurant. He takes the stairs up and a bell rings when he opens the heavy glass door.

 

“Irrashaimase!” the cashier calls at the sound. She’s the only employee he sees—a middle aged woman, presumably Japanese. Is he supposed to say something in response? He smiles, hoping his practiced charm overcomes his natural awkwardness, and gives a slight bow before shuffling into a nearby aisle. It’s a pretty authentic store—all the labels are all in Japanese, so he doesn’t really know where to start looking. He pulls out his phone and opens Naver to find out what natto even is.

 

The bell rings again, and the employee calls out as before. Natto is apparently fermented soybeans. Maybe it’s by the kimchi? Wait, would they have kimchi at a Japanese grocery store?

 

He messages the groupchat:

 

7:36PM

 

♔ **king baby**

would they sell kimchi at a Japanese grocery store

 

**cyclops**

donghan-ah are u alive did you make it through that weird neighborhood

♔ **king baby**

                its not that weird

 

**cyclops**

that arcade was pretty wild

ive never seen so many furries in one place

 

♬♫♬ **rap dad**

What?

 

♔ **king baby**

guys I just want to know about the kimchi??

                                                          cause like we have ramen I don’t know do they eat kimchi other places?

 

♬♫♬ **rap dad**

Of course. They eat kimchi everywhere we’re a globalized society.

 

♔ **king baby**

where’s sanggyun didn’t he travel to japan last year for a shoot

 

♬♫♬ **rap dad**

Why would I know? I’m not his keeper.

 

**cyclops**

youre not?

 

♬♫♬ **rap dad**

(ভ_ ভ)

He lost his phone on the subway and we’ve been riding trains for the last hour looking for it.

!! guys my iphone x I sbasicallly brand new if I cant find it im gonna LOSE MY LIFE

do I   LOOK ilike I hAve TIME to think about KIMCHI RIGHT NOW

 

**cyclops**

im sure itll turn up hyung don’t worry!

 

♔ **king baby**

It’s gone forever hyung youre going to have to get a flip phone ))”:

Ill miss you when you live in the dark ages like a cave person

 

♬♫♬ **rap dad**

Donghan he read that and teared up you’re paying for the emotional damages.

 

♔ **king baby**

his or yours

 

♬♫♬ **rap dad**

Both. Shell out punk.

 

**cyclops**

don’t worry hyung donghan-ah is going to cook for us

 

♬♫♬ **rap dad**

I don’t accept food as payment.

Nevermind Sanggyun stopped fake crying from where he’s lying on ground and said we do.

But it better be good.

 

Donghan tsks at his phone and locks it out of spite. His lockscreen shows a selfie Kenta posted last month, making a v-sign in front of a snowy landscape. Donghan never agrees to cook for his friends but somehow they always end up wheedling him until he gets so annoyed he just does. At least Hyunbin’s family lives nearby and he can visit them when he wants something home-cooked. The only reason Donghan knows how to make food is because he can’t afford not to.

 

The cashier and the new customer are chatting together in lively Japanese, and he understands basically none of it. One would think after obsessively watching Japanese videos on YouTube over the past year he would’ve picked something up, but he had other priorities. Like watching more videos. Or more accurately, since there were only about 60 on Kenta’s channel, watching the same videos on repeat.

 

There’s an aisle full of novelty items—peach Coca-Cola, Pocari-flavored Kit Kats, Pepsi-flavored Doritos. It’s not possible that any of it tastes good but the absurdity is almost enough to make him want to try it. Almost.

 

The conversation carries over the small grocery and catches in his ears, distracting him from his search. It sounds comfortable and almost soothing, the tones and rhythms. Its familiar in a way that he doesn’t question at first but then nags at the back of his mind. He doesn’t recognize the words, but…maybe the voice?

 

Who does he know that would speak Japanese?

 

He stands on his tiptoes to look over the shelf of condiments he’s been looking through, but whoever is at the register is too short for him to see.

 

“家族は元気がでしょうか.” the speaker says.

 

Taehyun speaks Japanese, but not nearly this fluently. Could it be a model he used to work with? There were a few Japanese models through the past couple years, but no one comes to mind as particularly memorable. There was one that guy who he’d almost hooked up with in a club last summer—to be honest he wouldn’t mind another shot at that.

 

He rounds the corner, ready to feign asking for help if only to—

 

But it’s not anyone he’s ever met before.

 

It’s a sweet snaggletooth smile and goofy oversized ears and heavily accented Korean as Kenta bows and says, “Sorry! I didn’t mean to hog the checkout stand.”

**Author's Note:**

> i promise donghan won't always be this moody he's in a bad place rn don't worry he works some stuff out
> 
> kenta's pov is next !


End file.
